A few things that have been happening over the past few days have really frustrated me. I have always been one who never gets easily worked up. And I never ever give up, especially when it comes to my India. But the events that have been unfolding have really got me thinking ... is it worth remaining here for young minds? Do we really deserve all this? Or are we getting what we sowed???

The first is the reservation issue. VP Singh made an ass of himself and the country when he accepted the Mandal commission report. Little would he have imagined what a great disservice he had done to us. But the inscrutable politician that he is, he and his ilk would still defend their decision! And now, a bloody 70+ (or is it 80+) "leader" wants to "revive" his political career. So what does he do? Bring back reservations! He does not care, does he? His children are already well educated in the best schools of the world - schools where he and his stupid ideas would find no ears anyways! And I guess even his grandchildren would be studying in some of the best institutions in the world...where merit only matters. Period. Such old men should be lying at home... in good Hindu tradition, taking the names of the Lord and waiting for death! Unfortunately for us, he is here - sanctioning death of meritocracy in a country already plagued by brain drain! There are so many central institutions, lacking even the basic infrastructure and faculty. Students come in and go out - that's it - there is no value addition whatsoever. What happens to the funds budgeted out every year, Mr. HRD minister? They go towards salaries? Whose salaries - yours or the faculty's? No one wants to bring the existing system out of the mess - old, insane men only want things to get messier!

We have a prime minister, who was said to be the best in business. A very knowledgeable and erudite scholar, who would lead the country ahead! And what does that man do? From the firsat day, he thanks his stars...no, thanks one Madam Sonia Gandhi for making him prime minister, helping him run the country, helping him run his house! Gawd.... can't these men do a single thing without some Madam or Amma helping them out? Bloody effeminates! My blood boils when I see that man as our prime minister ... he has no guts to take any decisions! As it is, there's a coalition; add to that pressures from a lady, who has been elevated to some godlike positions only coz she happens to be a Gandhi... 'n that too no relation to a Gandhi who is called the father of the nation. (Not that it would have helped that she was related to that Gandhi... I have big grudges against that man's ideology as well! That's a different story though!)

Thousands across the country are in protest. Yound men and women are on hunger strikes protesting reservations. (I am not one of them. I am not taking part in the protests...call me detached, tell me I'm an armchair critic ... whatever!) The government threatens ESMA, threatens removal...no effect. So what does it do? It does what any dictator would do - simply enforce reservations. Who can stop it anyway? The Congress raised a hue and cry sometime back when Bal Thakeray said that Indians deserve Dictatorship (Thokshahi) and not democracy. What is the Congress soing now? Democractic dictatorship anyone?

And now some other issues. The issue of the media. What does the media want? Just sensational news...that's it? No hard facts, no real depth of news, just sensationalism! If some celebrity has an extra marital affair, it is braking news! Everyone knows the Mumbai western line is under maintenance - yet these stupid presspersons will interview all and sundry about the problems they faced. If the western line in Mumbai is down, we will face problems dammit! We don't need you to say that..u $@#%%$

And now, every newspaper has thousands of pages! Where is the edit, where is the sports? I don't know...and I don't have the patience early in the morn to wade thru reams of unwanted shit to find a newspaper article!

And the latest issue...students of 10th and 12th face stress! Wow! I never knew that! I never faced any "stress" or "suicidal" feelings when I awaited my results. Maybe I was (am) extraordinary...Superman Jr. anyone? Nor did any of my friends feel any stress...I am sure of it! In fact the worst students of my class were the most relaxed! They knew...jo aayega bahut hai! And now, the Maharashtra Board has decided to scrap the felicitation held for the toppers. They say others would feel bad! WHAT THE HECK! I slog my ass out to get good marks... if you can't digest it GO TO HELL! Where is the question of getting stressed out come here? And what are parents for then? Every year, the media will highlight a case of some student suicide after the results. Does the media know how the child came upto the 10th or 12th standard? Does the media know how much money was pumped in by the rich parents so that teachers would promote the child? Does anyone know how much the child used to score till then? Will the media report this? No, why should it? After all this doesn't make interesting reading! This doesn't sell their papers or their channels!

The film Rang de Basanti dealt with a somewhat similar situation. What the youth did in the film was debated - again, some kinda hype by our good media! - yet who is to blame if some of our youth do the same. Can we really tell them it is wrong?

Alone...

Just some thought penned after I saw a post on loneliness...

The crowd swells, the world goes by...
yet the man is alone, all alone!

The party rocks, and the chicks are hot...
yet the party animal is alone, all alone!

He goes for a helping, perches on the table...
the conversation rocks, but he is alone, 'n the thoughts are his own!

The newsroom's buzzing, the master's quizzing...
the countdown begins, and now the reader's alone!

The mindless chaos, flowing humanity...
never a moment's rest, never a little pause...
yet man is alone, alone on his own...

Strange thing this thing called man...
seeks voice when needs he no noise...
seeks humanity when needs he just solitude...

Searching...

How do I leave in peace, not sorrow?
How do I leave the pain, and be happy?
How, how in all the world do I find a place that is mine forever?

How do I search for the eternal truth?
How do I seek a future that's unknown?
How, how in all the world do I find myself?

Where lies the secret of beauty?
Where lies that of longevity?
and where does lie the secret of a past, forgotten; and a future, dreamed of?

The truth then dawns, like the sunrays on the earth
like the flash of lightning on a sun kissed earth!

It is sorrow that leads unto happiness
and happiness unto pain...

The truth is here, there and everywhere...
why, the truth is here within us all to see!

The secrets are, but secrets of the heart
vieled they are by the unseeing eye...

I am one with the force supreme...
it's I who seek, and I who give...
It is me, me and only me!

Goodbye

It's been a long time since I blogged. Not that I was busy or something, in fact the last few months have been the most relaxed! But it happens, doesn't it? When you have all the bloody time in the world and yet you are not free!!! Anyways, this blog dedicated to IITM, the institution that I said goodbye to in the last week; and about which I had been meaning to write something for quite sometime now.

Sometimes I feel I'm not qualified enough to write on IITM ... that's for my BTech brothers ... who have spent four of their most wonderful years of their lives here. Sometimes, I felt that I do not belong here, MBAs were not a part of the "junta"!! But IITM proved me wrong, proved us all wrong!

As I leave this beautiful campus, here are a few memories that I'll carry with me.... I take nothing away from here, just memories...

Memories ....

...of a green campus, of a forest reserve, of humankind nestled in the lap of the jungle;

...of monkeys (lots of them!) that troubled you no end, yet the heart now longs for their presence;

...of the deer and black bucks, that you never gave a damn about, yet now realize you'll never ever live in the midst of;

...of JAM - the early days, and the struggles to find water to bathe, of those early mornings - running around with a bucket in hand!

...of JAM, of the 9th wing, where two years were lived, two years like never before ... never again;

...of the quadrangle - of footer, of volly - of the practice for Sports day!

...of Gurunath, of the "spot", of the times spent sipping mocha; :)

...of GC - where everything in IIT began and ended!

...of OAT - where I saw movies without paying for a ticket ever!!!

...of the HSS building - where my journey to a manager began!

I am left with images... images for which I need no prints, images embedded in the heart, images that'll remain - that I'll take to my grave....

Images of Saarang - how much more colorful can it ever get?

Images of an event called Samanvay - how it began and how it ended!

Images of DoMS - the new building

Images of the lab - where we sleeping souls outnumbered the blinking comps!

Images of virtual games - Virtua Tennis or BHD! - where many a Ghengis Khan was born 'n dead!!!

Images of 408Jam - images of the monk's abode!

... and finally memories of the friends I have made - friends - some who have remained so, some not! Yet all have taught me something! Relationships that have been made - made for life! A life that has been lived - a life of all but two years - yet a life that I will always remember. A life spent at IITM! And a life that has taught what 23 years couldn't!!!

Perhaps mere words fail to capture the experience - yet there is one thing that I will always regret - that I did not try for the IITs - that I could not spend four years of an undergraduate here .... yet I am thankful - thankful for a chance to be a part of the IIT - two years nevertheless!

It's time to say goodbye....